If I tell you who the SAP is, well, then I’d have to kill you, which would lead to a slight issue with one of the Ten Commandments.
The nickname popped up quite early on my Christian journey. I didn’t seek Christianity, God really did hunt me down, so I was often bemused by what was going on. When I decided to pick up the phone to a local church, it was the SAP who answered the phone.
Why smart alec? Aside from telling me in our first phone call how he knew this would end, the SAP busted every preconceived notion I held about anyone with a Rev. at the start of their name. One day he emailed me using the words ‘Saint’ and ‘Philippa’ in response to my shuddering horror when I realised I had been quietly evangelising.
I messaged back saying should he ever again use those two words together, I would head straight back to my new age runes and crystals. I then suggested he should go himself and fornicate under carnal knowledge. As soon as I hit send I froze in horror. Had I really just told a pastor to go, well, you know..?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! I believe I may have hit a nerve there, Phil! I will start calling you SPTE (Saint Phil The Evangelist).
Me: I am muttering under my breath about smart-alec pastors.
And so a nickname was born.